This or that.

"But even if..."

Powerful. "If" sets up a dichotomy of results.

Having faith in the Lord means not only believing He will come through for you in the way you desire, but trusting that "even if" He does not, you still will worship only Him. You still will trust only Him. I was challenged by those words tonight as I read Daniel 3.

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, "King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty's hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." (Daniel 3:16-18 NIV)

The actions of God did not affect these men's firm faith in Him. So many times, our faith seems to build when we witness a positive act of God. When we see something we like.

"You have proven yourself worthy of another ounce of my faith'" we say, as we subconsciously throw God more spiritual coins as though He moves for our observation and affirmation. We pat Him on the head and close His compartment.

But even if? If God throws a link in your plan. If you get in an accident before a very important endeavor. If you miss your flight before a very important event. If you lose something... Very important to you.

It's in Him we move, we breathe, and have our being (Acts 17:28). So when He moves, should we not move as well? If we are truly moving and breathing and essentially being in God... We cannot help but move as He does.

So when God makes a "wrong move" in your mind, ask yourself... Is He moving wrong, or am I simply refusing to move with Him?

Fear

I've been meditating a lot on the fear of the Lord, and it's been hitting me a lot that if only I had more fear of God, I would be less consumed with fear of everything else! If to everything God asked us to give up - money, time, relationships, comfort, control, fill in the blank - we immediately jumped up and said "YES!" oh, the things He could do through us if only we had His perspective...

But we can have it!

Jesus praying in the garden of Gethsemane = an example of human suffering with such reverent fear of the Father that it drove Him to the CROSS - where He suffered physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. That Jesus willingly went to the cross in utter submission. Would I do that for God? Would you? Yet if we truly feared God, we would indeed fear what would happen if we didn't obey! Abraham almost slaughtered his son simply because God commanded him to act in obedience (Genesis 22) v. 12 - "'Do not lay a hand on the boy," he said. "Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son."' (By the way, that is such a cool foreshadowing of God sending His only Son to die for us! Did you ever notice that?) God continues to proclaim a blessing on Abraham, promising that through him and his descendants, nations would be blessed! So the question is, who do you fear more?

Psalm 112 is an outline of a person who fears the Lord and what their life looks like. It talks about blessing and prosperity through integrity and generosity. v 7 - "He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord." I think of Job in the Bible. God himself said that Job was a man who feared Him (Job 1:8, 2:3), yet he got bad news after bad news... after bad news! So is that contradictory? Nope! See, I don't think we fully understand blessing until we have perspective. If we view everything (and I mean everything) we have as God's anyway, and reverent fear drives us to complete obedience, nothing we have (or don't have) matters. It doesn't matter if we live in a mansion in the Hollywood Hills or the slums in Ethiopia, if we fear God, we know that we are truly blessed beyond anything we will ever deserve. Yes, Job questioned God, but his perspective was that God is still sovereign, and he trusted that there was a higher purpose.

If only we acted more out of fear for our Creator - think of what we could do!

Pain & Suffering

  pain is pain. regardless of the circumstances, it feels pretty much the same. while uncomfortable and certainly not desirable, it is inevitable. it's also unifying. it causes us to empathize. Empathy is: a deep emotional understanding of another's feelings or struggles. it's what enables us to comfort those who have experienced abuse or trauma, suffered the lost of a loved one, had their heart broken, even if specific circumstances aren't shared. pain is something we all can relate to. human beings also have the remarkable ability to forget pain. we can all remember it, but it's a cerebral memory, not a physical one. it's what enables women to go through childbirth again. to date again after a painful breakup. to trust people after a horrible betrayal.

  not only that, we can take comfort in the fact that Jesus experienced pain and suffering while on earth. though I doubt he was ever abused as a child, he comforts those who have been. as a human, he has walked in suffering, and shares ours today. if pain never produced anything life-giving, it would be too despairing. it has to produce something beautiful, or else it would all be, for what? nothing. take comfort in the fact that Jesus not only understands our pain, but he can always turn it around to produce something beautiful. even if it's hard to see in the midst of it, he will use it for good. that's a promise. 

Awake with the Dawn

I like sleep. If I don't have to get up for any particular reason, I'm not gonna. I wish I could be one of those people who get up with the sun, run 5 miles, cook an elaborate breakfast, and be on their 3rd cup of coffee by 7am. Are there people out there like that, you ask? Yep, and I live with them ;) (and love it!) Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating a little. But still. Awake with the dawn. I heard a song with those lyrics in it. One of my favorite artists, Nichole Nordeman, writes such beautiful music that always touches my soul so deeply and I have the highest admiration, if not a touch of jealousy, for. One of her songs Mercies New, possesses these lines:

Your mercies are new every morning
So let me wake with the dawn

It may hold different meaning to others, but to me, that is desperation. To be so desperate for God's mercies that you need them as soon as possible! I know that if I don't go about my day without the knowledge of my desperate need for God, all I aspire to do is nonsense. If I am not operating in the power, wisdom, compassion, and authority of Him, I'm ineffective. Thank goodness for all those times I acted out of my own strength and wisdom, and God's grace covered it. Imagine if we walked around as desperate for God as the air we breathe. I never want to get used to what happened on the cross. I never want my heart to stop breaking over what happened that day. I know that only through a perpetual broken and humble heart, will God be able to use me.

Why this difficulty?

Because He loves you. He has in mind to strip you of depending on yourself in ways you didn't even know you were depending on yourself, to humble you and create something beautiful.

Entry #23 - Persistence + Patience = Perseverance

  The persistent widow (Luke 18) did not give up until she was given justice. Jesus likens this parable to our prayer life, encouraging us to be persistent in prayer. God always answers our prayers. Sometimes the answer is "yes," sometimes it's "no," sometimes it's "wait." But He always answers.

  James 5:7 - "Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains." I love the comparison of our life being compared to a farmer and his crop. Just as there are seasons in the weather that produce life, we go through seasons as well, and those seasons are necessary for growth. We need the rains as well as the sunshine. And the farmer is patient because he knows his crop is valuable. Anything that is of value is going to take work, effort, and patience.


  I think I have been persevering (or trying to), without keeping the persisting + patience part into perspective. Persevering is work. I am tired emotionally and spiritually in my efforts to just "persevere." Having patience can be restful. Persisting is simply not giving up. Together, they equal perseverance. Galatians 6:9 - "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." I don't want to take the easy route that teaches me nothing and produces nothing of value. I want to persevere in patience, and persistence.   

Entry #22 - Chasing Glory

It is my conviction that the answer to a lot of confusion in the American church (as I can speak little about the church in France having never been there) is a renewed passion for and vision of God's glory. His Glory is what we lack, according to a literal reading of Romans 3:23, and His Glory is what the Christian ought to be striving after, according to 2 Corinthians 3:18. Without this perspective, I observe (and you can too) that Christians' attention is turned to rules in many circles. I mean, endless discussion about rules. Some say Christians should be more strict in some area, and some say Christians should be more lax and loving. And the whole conversation centers around Christians, and the rules. I know the routine from 5 years total in Bible college. For the person seeking a more thorough and genuine Christian experience, it seemed that legalism and liberalism were the only two options. Some would angrily state that Christians ought never to drink alcohol, a prohibition the New Testament never gives, because "Christians should be different". Others would get annoyed at this, and instead, join Rob Bell in his equally unbiblical view of hell, summed up in his "provocative" statement that he was more concerned about hell on earth than eternal hell.

This is a sad, sad waste of time. The ultimate pursuit of the Christian life is God Himself, and in all His Glory. How we got so focused on ourselves, I know not, but I know that a desperation for God Himself is the answer. His holiness is the blaring element of ultimate reality that gives coherence to every doctrine; man, sin, depravity, faith, regeneration, and so on. With our weak view of His holiness we flap our gums in vain about the true meaning of Christianity, because Christianity is reconciliation to a God Whom we have been trained by way of distractions not to chase after.

I could write longer on this general topic, and I have. The particular thing I wanted to post about was the actual chasing of His glory, which I have struggled with in mind and soul. So this is a brief thought for anyone else who, like me, is chasing after glory but struggling to know what that even means.

Those who speak predominantly on the glory of God also tend to speak predominantly in abstract terms, which I believe has created an ache and a disconnect for me. What I mean is, I know that knowing and beholding the glory of God should be the source of my ultimate victory over various sins, yet I meander in the same handful of sins over and over. And so when I talk about the transforming power of the glory of God, I speak of something that is true, and an idea that I love, yet one that I am somehow failing to let empower me, day-to-day. So if I dare force this idea on anyone, it makes me a bit of a liar or a quack.

It occurred to me that I am missing out on experiencing the glory of God, because I am thinking of this pursuit in abstract terms. Granted, God is beyond us. But His glory is seen not only in the starry expanse that covers us at night but in the goodness of His ways. I mean the way He would have us live. I mean loving and forgiving each other. I mean staying faithful, both physically and in one's heart, to one's spouse. I mean giving freely to those in need, with a loose grip on one's possessions.

To break it down even further, for Kurt to overcome lust, he is to fight with not only an awareness of God's radiance but a love for marriage, and all it stands for, and how joyous it can be. I must see God's glory reflected not only in stars and mountains and oceans and planets, but in the exclusivity and love of human marriage. I must see God's glory in the keyboard I type this blog with. I must see God's glory in every practical and real thing, and in the way of life illuminated for us in the Gospels and epistles. That is (one aspect of) what it means to truly pursue the beauty and majesty of God in this life. And the ball is rolling.